Chapter 160
Xander POV
I agreed to stay out of the Hollow, Serafine said it was too much of a risk. I don’t have magic like hers, not unless she’s with me and I connect with hers
It’s getting harder though, the more Eryx is drawn to it, the more I want to follow him into it. We also promised to give him space, he’s too advanced for children his own age, but we’re not ready to allow him to sit down with adults and have conversations that someone his age should never be having
We told him if he ever wanted to venture into the Hollow, he has to go with Serafine, that was the deal, but he still sneaks out and goes.
“Try not to shout, Xander,” Serafine says. That is becoming harder to follow as well, it’s not like Eryx was allowed to do what he wanted growing up. There were always rules, but lately it’s like those rules don’t assign to him.
“He’s still a child and needs to remember that,” I grit out.
“Xander,” she says softly. “He’s not, to us yes, he’s ten, he is a child. He’s not though, don’t act like you haven’t noticed.”
My head shakes instantly. “I’ve noticed nothing, except he’s a child who doesn’t listen.”
“Alpha, you admitted it yourself the other day, that Eryx is no longer a child,” Killian says as he steps into the room.
“He’s only been born ten years, I don’t care if he ages differently, he’s still a child,” I snap.
Killian holds up his hands. I know that I’m fighting a losing battle. I can feel it in every argument, in the way my own mind is telling me to let it go. I can’t though. Even though I know they are right, I can’t just forget he’s only been walking for nine years. I can’t ignore the fact he was only able to feed himself right for eight years.
“You’re still doing it, Xander,” Serafine whispers.
“What do you want, me to accept and say that he’s no longer a child?” I ask.
“You know he isn’t, from the age of five he grew and aged quicker. The doctor, Helena, even the Healer who visited all said he’s now at least eighteen.”
“Just because his body is that of an eighteen–year–old does not mean he’s not ten!”
She rolls her eyes like this argument is tiring and maybe it is? Rubbing my face, I try to push down the unease, the worry, and the defiance. I get it, Eryx isn’t a child. Him not fitting in isn’t through his lack of trying, it’s because he’s not a child, even if I refuse to accept it.
“What do you want?” I ask quietly.
“Give him responsibility, as the future Alpha of this pack, give him some of the responsibilities you would if he had been born eighteen years ago. Maybe then he won’t be so drawn to the Hollow?” Serafine looks at me hopeful.
“What responsibility? Everything an eighteen–year–old would do in the pack he’s going to be Alpha of in the future is hard, it’s war, it’s battles, i That’s not for a ten–year–old.”
There’s a quiet laugh, and 1 look up to see Amelia walk in. “Hey, Dad,” she whispers and hugs me.
I relax slightly and hug her back. “Hey, Princess, how did it go?” I ask.
“Amazing, a lot of the Omegas and Gammas are happy to follow the outline.”
She’s really good at things, I’ve watched her grow into an amazing young woman.
“You don’t have an issue with me,” she says and I stare at her. “How old do you say I am, Dad?”
“Sixteen, why?” I ask.
1/2
the
08:11 Fri, 4 Jul
Chapter 160
“Because you accept that I grew and aged quicker, but won’t accept that Eryx has?”
She smiles at me like she’s got me backed into a corner, which she has.
“That’s different, you’ve grown up in a way to show you’re an adult, but you haven’t just left everything behind you. You still call me Dad, you still have your teddy,” I argue.
“And he calls you Alpha,” she says and I nod.
“If you want my advice, Alpha, this has nothing to do with Eryx growing too quickly, or you thinking he’s not ready. It’s more the fact you feel you lost out on moments with your son as he grew.” Killian leans against the door.
“Amelia is always your princess, she’s not letting go of that, but Eryx, he wants his independence, he wants to take roles that push you out of his life and you can’t stand that,” Killian explains.
“I’ll try,” I reply, although I know it won’t be easy for me to do. Serafine hugs me, and Amelia walks out.
“He wants to please you, Xander. Where Amelia wants to be your little girl, Eryx wants to show he’s good enough to follow you and walk in your footsteps.”
Which is the issue. “My footsteps was losing a mate young, and then focusing on revenge for over a decade. Followed by abusing my new mate and almost losing her and my son.” How can she not see walking in my footsteps is not a good thing?
“He’s strong,” she says. “Give him a chance, Xander. Because if you don’t, what is to stop him from spending a decade running from home and living in random packs to get the freedom he needs?”
He wouldn’t, but even as I think that, I wonder, would he? His mate isn’t here, by the way he’s grown, he’s at the age where he should find his mate.
“I just don’t like it, Amelia still kept that child side to her. Eryx, though, didn’t. He began sleeping less, and focusing on learning. While Amelia might be older for her age, she’s still learning, she’s not pushing, Eryx is,” I explain.
“Because Eryx wants to be like you, Xander, and in his mind the way to do that is to train, learn, and get better at everything. You need to accept it, or be is going to keep going into the Hollow, as that’s the place he clearly feels accepted as himself.”
She turns to leave, then stops and turns to face me. “Goddammit, Xander, his last birthday, if I was an outsider it would look like a cruel joke! Get over it,” she snaps and storms out.
That’s not what I was expecting at all, maybe though she’s right? I’ve spent so long fighting this, pushing against it, maybe now she’s had enough of the
stress?
“You wanted me, Alpha?” Eryx says as he steps into the room.
Alpha… I want to ban that word, banish it for life. Even if I know it’s not possible, the thought makes me smile.
