Conrad POV
I open my eyes, and I’m in Lewana’s Cabin. She is awake, next to me, staring lovingly into my eyes. The sun is just starting to rise, and the gentle morning light bathes her in a soft glow that makes her look like the Goddess she is.
I feel how soft her skin is and kiss those supple lips as I feel her warmth next to me. She starts giggling and throws the covers off, showing every inch of her perfect body.
She runs out the door, and I chase after her. I can see her darting behind trees, and then the white fur of Serena plays too.
She runs behind a tree, but when we get there. She’d vanished.
I laugh as I know how good she is at hiding. “Moonlight, where did you go?“.
Silence.
The fear and dread start washing over me as the panic rises in my chest.
I scream out into the forest. “LEWANA. WHERE ARE YOU?“.
Only the echo of my voice can be heard, mocking my desperate attempts to find her.
The forest grows cold and dark. The shadows of the trees moved along the ground as if chasing me. I start hearing whispers in the forest getting louder as I run searching for my Luna Queen.
“Failure. Liar. Disappointment. You broke your promise. You couldn’t keep her safe“.
I get caught in vines, and the vines wrap around my limbs, pinning me in place. The darkness grows and eventually
consumes me.
My eyes fly open, and I scream out again, thrashing against the vines.
“LEWANA“.
“It’s OK, son. You’re in the hospital. You’re having a nightmare“. I see Arthur’s face, but I still can’t move.
I start thrashing in the bed to break free, and that’s when I notice the restraints. All four limbs are tied to the hospital bed and a chest plate to keep me still.
Jace surges forward. “RELEASE ME. NOW“.
“Not happening until you breathe and calm down“.
“I HAVE TO FIND HER. LEWANA. LEWANA“.
Arthur keeps talking to me in a calming tone. “We will find her. If you love her like I know you do, you will breathe and calm down. For her. Do it for her“.
I start focusing on his face, and he starts breathing, and I copy him. In and out. In and out.
I eventually calm down enough to maintain a conversation with him. “What the hell am I doing here, and why am I strapped to a bed?“.
He sighs and sits back down again. “You’re here because I shot you with two traq darts. You’re strapped to the bed because you have lost your mind since Lewana was taken“.
I use my Alpha Command on him. “Release me. Now“.
“Unfortunately for you, that won’t work on me. Lewana has only ever given me one Alpha Command, and that was to disobey all Alpha Commands, no matter who gives them, if it puts the pack at risk to follow them. She did it when she was a child, which is how I could disobey Blake and support the pack“.
I can feel the anger building in me. He shouldn’t be using her name. I snap at him. “You do not have permission to call her by her name. She is your Luna Queen and will address her as such“.
“She is my Alpha and daughter. I will call her what I want. Also, I don’t need your permission as I have hers“.
Goddess, I want to punch this prick. I start thrashing against the restraints again and realise I am weaker than normal.
“What have you done to me?“.
“You see the drip going into your arm. It has a mild tranquilizer in it. Just enough to take the edge off so we have the possibility of having a conversation without you being a Jackass“.
I start to panic again. I need to find her, and that’s not going to happen strapped to a bed.
“We’re wasting time. You need to let me go. I need to find her“.
He remains calm and keeps his tone even. “And what are you going to do when you find who has taken her?“.
Jace surges forward with a blood lust. “Kill them all“.
“I surprised you yesterday because you were sloppy and not thinking things through. Then I kicked your ass. How are you going to go into battle to save her when you can’t even take down a Beta in his 50s?“.
I look away. That can’t be what happened. I start getting glimpses of yesterday. Fragments of a puzzle I try to put together.
He’s right. I was so focused on killing Cordelia that he had defeated me easily. The voices in the forest were right. I couldn’t save. I had broken my promise to keep her safe. She deserved better than a failure like me.
“Easy, Conrad, I need you to breathe again for me“. I look and see Arthur focusing on me to try to get me breathing with him again. I copy him again. It takes five breaths, but I calm down.
I look at him pleading for an explanation. I can feel my eyes filling with tears as I try to hold them back. “What’s happening to me?“.
“You’re lost. Because you have a soulbond with Lewana, and now that bond is missing, it’s thrown you and Jace off. This has always been the curse that comes with the blessing of fated mates. When one mate dies, the other often does too due to a broken heart. Half of your soul is currently missing, which means you can’t focus on anything and you are doing more harm than good“.
My voice cracks. I speak in a voice just above a whisper. “How do I get the pain to stop? The nightmares to leave“.
2/3
Chapter 143
“You don’t. You need to embrace them. Accept that they are there and that you are hurting. Then learn to deal with it until you either get Lewana back, or can function while managing and carrying the pain“.
I knew what he was saying. What would happen if I never got her back? What if she were gone forever?
I couldn’t stop the tears. They flowed out of me like fire burning my face. I screamed at the top of my lungs, letting everyone know my pain as Arthur just laid a hand on my shoulder while I got my despair out.
Chapter 144
