The heart is beating.
The wrap party was in full swing. Everyone was
chanting for Jason and Sarah to “kiss, kiss,
kiss,” just like their characters in the show.
They exchanged a look, a knowing smile, and
then, bam, they were lip–locked. Amidst the
whoops and hollers, someone yelled, “How
about the second lead and the male lead, huh?”
Jason’s face went stone cold.
The second lead was me. And I was Jason’s
actual girlfriend.
The room went silent, thick with awkwardness.
Sarah quickly looped her arm around Jason’s.
“Come on, guys, don’t be silly. I’ll give Jason
another kiss! Don’t make him do something he
doesn’t want to.”
Doesn’t want to? I thought about the guy who’d
had me pinned against a wall the night before,
<
kissing me for a good ten minutes. I set down.
my drink, walked over to them, and plastered a
smile on my face. “It’s just a kiss, right? No big
deal. Come on, movie star, play along.”
Jason’s brow furrowed. “Amy.” Warning bells..
“Amy, honey,” Sarah chirped, shielding Jason.
with her body. “Everyone’s just joking. Don’t
take it seriously.” Her hand rested possessively
on Jason’s waist. They looked like a picture of
inseparable bliss.
“Get off him,” I said quietly.
Sarah blinked, her eyes instantly welling up.
Jason’s expression darkened. “Amy, don’t make
a scene.”
Sarah tugged on his sleeve. “Don’t be so harsh.
Amy’s probably just had a bit too much to drink.
It’s the wrap party, don’t be mad.” He gave her
a look of exasperated fondness and gently
squeezed her hand. So intimate.
I looked up at him, this man who was so eager to protect Sarah. Just like in the show, I was
the villain, and he was the devoted boyfriend. Except I was his real girlfriend, and he’d never protected me like this, not once, not in public.
“Get out,” I said, the word laced with disgust. “Both of you. Get out.”
Of course, they didn’t. I stormed out, slamming the door behind me.
Later, sitting on the hotel roof, nursing a drink,
a text from Jason arrived: “Come back.
Apologize to Sarah. Say you were drunk.”
Right. I blocked his number.
A light rain started to fall. I tilted my head back, feeling the dampness on my face. It made me think of the four years I’d spent with Jason.
<
Four years I’d stood by him, watching him rise
from internet fame to a bona fide movie star.
He’d gotten his big break in a web series, a surprise hit. The studio paired him with Sarah,
his co–star, and forced them into a fake
relationship for publicity. He’d hated it at first.
He’d hold me and say, “I’m so sorry, babe. I don’t want to do this. I have to pretend she’s
you just to make myself smile.”
He’d promised, “Just wait, babe. When I’m big enough, when I don’t have to play their games anymore, I’ll tell the whole world I love you.”
We’d talked about the future. A dog, two kids, a
cozy life together.
When had things changed? He’d started
returning my calls less and less, while the looks.
he gave Sarah grew softer and softer. They
played the “couple” game for four years, never
confirming, always hinting. He tied her
shoelaces on set, took her on bike rides
through the countryside. Behind the scenes, he got his lawyer to handle her defamation
lawsuits and took her to dinners with famous
directors. Their fans ate it up, calling them the “Detail Couple” because they could always find little “hints” of their “romance” in their
interactions.
Maybe somewhere along the line, the acting had become real. I was just too caught up in it all to see.
My agent, Rhonda, called while I was getting tipsy. “Amy, where are you?”
I mumbled a response.
“There’s been a situation. You’re trending.”
Trending? My head cleared a little. I checked
my phone. Someone had posted the video from
the wrap party. The top four trending topics
were all about Jason and Sarah:
#JasonSarah EyeContact
#JasonSarah WrapPartyKiss
#JasonSarah WhenWillTheyGoPublic
#JasonSarah WeddingGiftHowMuch
And then, starting at number five, it was all
about me:
#AmyClown
#AmyBulliesSarah
#AmyNepotismBaby
The comments were brutal.
“Who does she think she is? With that nasty
attitude, she wants to kiss our Jason?”
“So gross. Did they have to air out the room.
after she left?”
“She’s got such an attitude, storming out like
sonda ta nhaal, har
<
I refused, and we had a huge fight. “My
contract with this agency is almost up, Amy. Can’t you just be understanding?” He said I was being unreasonable. But he didn’t understand
how hard I’d worked for that role. The director
had my back at first. He’d told me he wouldn’t
give in to the pressure. He got fired the next
day. I was demoted to the second lead, the
villain.
That night, I’d stared at Jason and Sarah’s joint promotion for the new show, chewing each bite.
of my sandwich slowly. They say bread tastes.
sweeter the longer you chew it, but all I tasted.
was bitterness. Sometimes, you need to see it
with your own eyes, hear it with your own ears,
to finally let go. Back then, I still held onto a
sliver of hope that once his contract was up, we
could finally be together, free from all the
constraints. I wanted to be close to him, so I
took the role in the show. It was like being
stabbed repeatedly, watching their “sweet”
moments on and off camera.
く
Tears streamed down my face as I scrolled.
Another trending topic:
#JasonProtectiveBoyfriend. The comments
were full of people urging them to get married, interspersed with curses and insults directed at me. They said people like me, who bully others, should just die.
An hour had passed, and Jason hadn’t said a word to clear things up. Everyone involved was staying silent, letting the hashtags climb higher. and higher.
