Burning
Serafine POV
I rush through the building and out, then into the main house. I don’t make it far, the moment I step inside the pack house the air changes. It feels thicker, warmer and presses close to my skin like steam. My pulse instantly kicks up again, deep in my throat, and I pause, resting my hand against the stone wall to steady myself. Something inside of me is pacing, I can feel her, my wolf. She’s awake now and unsettled, scraping against the edges of my mind.
I don’t know what I’m doing, I just know that I need to get away. From the noise, from the stares, from the people, from everything. The corridor twists, and I follow it, finding the room I slept in. It’s my bedroom, so I should be fine in here. The sheets are clean. There are more clothes now sitting on the drawers.
Stepping in more, I close the door with more force than necessary. The sound echoes loudly, but I ignore it. I slide the lock across and ensure it’s in place. Then I grab a chair and shove it under the handle. I’m not sure why, but I feel like I should hide right now.
The second I feel the room is secure, I drop onto the edge of the bed and drag in a breath that barely reaches the bottom of my lungs. I’m burning. This isn’t just warm or even flushed. It’s like my skin is on fire. It’s like the heat is coming from the inside and seeping out. My skin tingles. It feels overly aware of everything. Every slight shift of fabric, every thread that touches me, feels too extreme.
Stripping off my clothes, I put on a silk nightgown, hoping that it would help. As I sit down again, it still doesn’t help. It clings wrong, every shift of it feels extreme. I press my legs together, trying to fight the ache that keeps pulsing low in my stomach, but it doesn’t help.
What is wrong with me? I feel…empty, almost needy. I feel like something is missing, and my chest is tight. My breathing is too fast. I clench my fingers into the bedspread and squeeze, trying to rid my body and mind of this feeling that’s pulsing through me.
A knock at the door startles me, and I freeze.
“Serafine?” It’s a woman’s voice, soft, and older. I’m not sure who it is though. I don’t answer, my throat feels dry, and my mouth feels stuck together.
It’s hard to swallow, but I know if I don’t speak, they will worry something has happened. “I’m fine,” I manage to choke out.” I… think that I just need to lie down.”
There’s a pause before she speaks, her voice full of worry. “Are you feeling ill?”
“Yes,” the word comes out fast. “I think that I’m homesick. Maybe just tired from so much travelling,” I lie.
Silence flows for a while before she begins to reply again. “All right. I shall let Alpha Xander know. If you need anything, please just let us know. I hope you feel better soon.”
I stay still, waiting until I hear her footsteps leave. When they disappear, I pull my knees up and sit curled in the center of the bed. I can’t stop shifting and moving. My body doesn’t seem to want to settle. My skin is damp now, sweat beads beneath my arms, at the back of my neck and on my forehead. My thighs feel slick, and I hate that I don’t understand. All I know is my wolf isn’t quiet like she normally is.
She’s prowling, low and hungry sounds pressing against my ribs. It’s not words, not even like a conversation, but it feels instinctual. She feels something. She knows something. Something inside me is calling, reaching, and I don’t know what to do with it or how to fix it.
The sheets seem to feel heavy beneath me, so I push them aside, before getting off the bed entirely and pacing the room. Dragging my fingers through my hair, I try to focus on the cool floor beneath my feet. The issue is, it doesn’t stop, or pr help the burn that’s crawling across my body. My nipples are tight beneath the fabric, and my breathing is still all over t place.
I hate this. Goddess, I hate how out of control I feel right now. Yet, still…there’s a part of me that paces, that wants…wants something! I can’t turn it off, I can’t remove this feeling. No matter how many times I try to close my eyes, or how many breaths I take, it doesn’t go away. It doesn’t fade, it doesn’t ease, if anything, it gets worse with every movement!
The sheets are twisted beneath me. I push them aside and pace the room, dragging fingers through my hair. The cool stone under my feet does nothing to stop the burn crawling across my body. My nipples are tight beneath the fabric. My breathing is all over the place.
I’m not sure how long I’m pacing for, my feet are sore, but I can’t stop. Wetness seeps between my thighs, and I clench my fists. Something is wrong with me.
Another knock comes, and I jump, unsure of how much time has passed.
“Miss Serafine?” It’s a different voice this time, someone younger. “We were told you weren’t feeling well. I’ve brought you some food, I wasn’t sure if you would be up for eating?”
1/2
Burning
My stomach twists, and the smell comes through the door, hitting me before anything else. It’s warm bread, meat and something sharp and sweet beneath it. It should be appetizing, but all it does is make my throat close. My body rejects the thought of food instantly. My stomach clenches, and I cover my mouth.
“I’m not hungry,” I gasp out, my voice even thinner now.
There’s another pause. “Would you like me to come in and check on what’s making you ill?”
“NO!” The word escapes, it’s loud and sharp and comes out far too fast. I swallow hard, panic begins flaring in my chest at the thought of anyone seeing me right now like this. “I’m fine,” I whisper. “I just…I jest need to rest. I’m sorry for snapping,” I call out, trying to calm myself.
The space goes silent again for a brief moment. “Very well,” she says before I hear her footsteps getting further and further away. Good, I need to be left alone.
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