Book 1: Chapter 5
The t
he twins were born on Founder’s Day during the city’s fireworks display.
Matthew was by my side throughout my labour and delivery, and I thought that maybe I had been overthinking and being a little crazy about Seline. Perhaps it was the hormones. But he was right by my side when I needed him the most.
Alex was born first. He was pink and screaming, clearly unhappy about leaving the comfort of the womb.
Matthew smiled, and I cried tears of joy as he was born, and they said our first was a boy. The nurses got him all cleaned up while I pushed out the second baby.
Anna. My little girl. My little princess. She was much quieter and a little smaller than her brother. As soon as they brought her over to me, she looked up at me with such intensity I could swear she could see into my soul. She was tiny and perfect. Her nose looked like a little button, and her ears were so
teeny.
I looked at my son when they brought him over after I’d finished birthing his sister. He had a slight frown, still clearly unhappy about his eviction. He had a strong chin and his father’s nose. He was already a curious little fellow. He was looking around everywhere he could.
I know babies don’t have the best vision for the first few months of life, but my kids looked like they could see everything and everyone.
We had agreed, Matthew and I, that I would try breastfeeding but also pump so Matthew could feed them from a bottle. Of course, that would depend on whether t produced enough milk for both.
Once the babies and I had been cleaned up, I was returned to my room, where Matthew and I lay together on the bed, each of us holding a baby. We enjoyed each other’s company and marveled at these two tiny humans that the hospital was just going to let us take home!
My mother was the first to arrive, followed almost immediately by my in–laws. The tension could be cut with a knife.
If I thought my mother–in–law looked down on me, it was nothing compared to how she treated my mother with disdain. She treated Mrs. Watkins better than my mother, and she was not nice to Mrs. Watkins – because she’s ‘the help‘.
My mother gushed over me and the babies. We FaceTimed with my brother, who was away for school, and my sister, who was on her way from college to meet her niece and nephew.
My brother gushed over the babies and said he couldn’t wait to come home and spoil them.
“You’ll have some competition there,” Matthew smiled.
My brother frowned. He never really liked Matthew and never came around to changing his opinion.
When my in–laws came in, I saw my mother almost immediately take a step back. I grabbed her hand so she wouldn’t move, refusing to let Rachel
intimidate her.
“Collette,” my mother–in–law said tersely. If I am honest, I’m surprised Rachel even acknowledged her.
“Rachel,” my mother replied. “It’s good to see you for such a happy occasion.”
Rachel barely acknowledged my mother and simply hummed.
I smiled at my mom. She tried, and she knew who she was dealing with. But she was always a lady and always pleasant to my in–laws, even if they were rarely pleasant. That was something I always loved about my mother.
Eventually, the nurse told my in–laws and mom that visiting hours were over and that they would have to leave and let our new little family rest, relax and get to know each other.
After many pictures, kisses, and hugs – even Rachel hugged me for what I’m pretty sure was the first time – they all left, and Matthew and I were left alone with our two sleeping angels.
A little while later, Alex started squawking for food, so, with the nurse’s help, we got both babies latched on and nursed themselves to sleep.
Matthew transferred both babies into the little bassinettes in our room and settled into the chair beside my bed.
“You did amazing, Amelia. They’re so beautiful. Our little Prince and Princess,” he smiled at me. “I’m so proud of you.”
I smiled. It was the first time in a long while that I heard words of praise from Matthew. Everything else always seemed to be an issue for him,
especially with Seline in the picture.
I had begun to notice that Matthew would compare something Seline did to something I had done. He had seemingly forgotten that I had been nine months pregnant with twins and didn’t exactly have the same energy level as someone who wasn’t pregnant.
But tonight, with the fireworks in the sky above the city, he was beside me, marvelling at our two beautiful children as they slept in their little
1/5
Book 1. Chapter 5
bassinettes, all swaddled in receiving blankets and tiny hats covering their tiny heads. I fell asleep staring at the babies.
After what had to have only been a couple of hours, I was awoken by the babies starting to whimper. Figuring they were probably both hungry and in need of a diaper change, I sat up and turned on the light that Matthew had presumably turned off so we could get some sleep.
“Matthew, can you grab me a couple of diapers?” I asked and then looked up at the chair he’d been sitting in. It was empty. He’d left and hadn’t said a word. He’d probably gone to get a coffee, or use the washroom, or get some air. I figured he’d probably be back in a little while and thought nothing more about it as I called for a nurse to assist me with getting the babies changed and fed.
The nurse weighed each baby and noted their weight and said she would weigh them again when they were finished. She wanted to ensure they were getting enough to eat and were gaining weight.
“Although, it’s not uncommon for babies to lose a little bit of their birth weight in the first couple of days, we want to make sure they don’t continue losing weight,” she explained.
Once again, the nurse helped me get the babies latched, and they fed a little longer this time than they had the first time.
I marvelled at the two adorable little creatures attached to my breasts. They made suckling noises as they nursed, and Alex let out a little grunt every once in a while.
Once they were done, the nurse weighed each one before swaddling them back up in their receiving blankets and placing them back in their bassinettes, where they immediately fell asleep again. I guess being born is hard work.
I decided to wait a little to see if Matthew would return, but fell asleep again before he did.
The babies woke me up a second time. Once again, a nurse came to help me, but Matthew was still absent.
“Have you seen my husband by any chance?” I asked the nurse.
“He left here hours ago. Got a phone call and left in a hurry,” she said, as she put Alex on the scale before helping me latch him again.
I frowned, wondering who could have called and had him running. It had to have been for work. Davenport Industries was in the middle of a huge merger, but I couldn’t imagine that something would have come up in the middle of the night that Matthew would have to attend to immediately.
I decided not to think about it and gladly welcomed my friends who had visited and met the babies.
“Word around the office is you’re not coming back,” my assistant Emily said.
“I’m taking some time off to be with my kids, yes. But I’m not sure how long I’ll be off for,” I said. I had left my return open.
After the surprise brunch months ago, Matthew and I had a serious talk. I explained how I felt and said I didn’t appreciate my future being discussed without me being present. We had agreed I would take the first year off, and we’d discuss extending it in a few months.
As much as I wanted to be a mother, I loved being a lawyer. Jason Anderson, the professor who has asked me to co–write the textbook, and I have started the project. I was excited by it. I loved the research. I loved explaining what I did as a job in a way that high school students could hopefully appreciate and enjoy learning about. I considered the textbook my legacy. No matter what, if our project got published, I would always have left a part of my knowledge for others to learn from. And I had no reason to believe the book wouldn’t get published. We had already been getting praise from the publisher, the editor, and Jason’s agent, who had agreed to represent me in this project, and some of the test readers even said they found the material approachable exactly as I had hoped.
Once I was released from the hospital, I would continue with the book. Jason would come to the house to work or meet when we could, either at a library or a coffee shop.
But first, I had to recover from pushing two babies out of my body. We were far enough ahead of our deadlines that Jason wasn’t too concerned if I took a few weeks off to recuperate and recharge.
My friends and colleagues left just as my lunch was arriving, and as Alex decided he needed to show the world the might of his bowels.
My nurse, Jaqueline, helped me clean him up and put him into a fresh diaper and sleeper. She took my blanket to the hospital laundry to be cleaned. I felt badly that they’d have to deal with baby poop, but Jacqueline assured me the hospital laundry saw far more than baby poop and it would not faze them.
Matthew sauntered in at three o’clock, staring at his phone. I had just returned the babies for a nap and contemplated sleeping a little.
“Oh,” he said as he came into the room. It was almost as though he was surprised to find me exactly where he had left me the night before. “Hi.”
“Did you get lost?” I asked, looking at him in fresh clothes, hair washed and styled in his usual style. He’d gone home and showered at some point.
“What do you mean?” He frowned at me.
“I woke up in the middle of the night and you were gone. I thought you’d gone to get coffee or a snack, but it’s three in the afternoon and this is the first time I’ve seen you since the babies were born,” I said.
“Amelia,” he said, a slight hint of exasperation in his voice. “You know we’re in the middle of a merger. Something came up and I was up all night trying to deal with it. I just ran home to shower and change and came straight back here.”
2/5
Book 1: Chapter 5
He came over and kissed my forehead.
I nearly vomited from the cloying, sweet scent of artificial roses.
Seline’s perfume.
“Mom and Dad say hello and they’ll come visit again when we get home. I have a surprise for you at home, by the way,” he winked at me.
“Mmhm,” I said.
“You’re not mad, are you?” He asked, looking at me with puppy dog eyes. “I didn’t think I’d be as long as I was. It was more complicated than I’d thought and took up the whole night. I promise, Amelia, I was in the office all night.”
“Was Seline in the office with you?” I asked, waving my hand in front of my nose.
“Of course not,” he frowned.
“Then have you taken to wearing women’s perfume? Because I can smell hers all over you.”
“Oh!” He said, realization crossing his face. “She came by the house to drop off a baby gift. You’ll love it!”
I doubted that very much and intended to dispose of whatever it was as soon as we were home.
I didn’t have the energy to argue now, so I accepted his explanation and relaxed back on the bed.
We went home a few days later, and I was looking forward to sleeping in my own bed, wearing my own clothes again, and just relaxing as a new family of four.
Matthew carried both of the babies‘ carriers into the house, and I followed close behind. I was looking forward to the quiet.
“Oh! You’re home!” I heard a voice. I hoped to be the last voice I would haave had to hear in my home right when I got out of the hospital. “Can I see the babies?”
My instinct was to shield both of the babies from Seline, but Matthew, smiling, carried them into the den. I could hear Seline squealing and gushing over them. I walked into the den on my own.
“Oh, Amanda, they’re absolutely gorgeous!” Seline said in my general direction. I didn’t respond.
“Amelia?” Matthew asked, looking at me.
“Yes?” I said.
“Aren’t you going to respond?” he said.
“Respond to what?” I asked, feigning innocence.
“Seline just said the babies are gorgeous. Didn’t you hear her?” he said.
“I heard her, but she wasn’t talking to me, I said.
“Don’t be ridiculous. Who else would she be talking to?” he frowned at me.
“Whoever ‘Amanda‘ is,” I said. “Because after five years, she still hasn’t managed to get my name right. So, she couldn’t have been talking ot me, because my name is not Amanda. And you know that perfectly well.”
I was tired of this ridiculous game Seline kept wanting to play, and I stopped playing it.
“Amelia, stop being petty. Seline probably just wasn’t thinking,” Matthew said.
“That would explain a lot,” I muttered.
“Did Matthew show you what I got the babies, Andrea?” Seline asked, looking up at us.
I looked at Matthew and raised my eyebrow. She’d used the wrong name twice, and even Matthew had to do a double–take.
“Amelia hasn’t been home, Seline,” he said, emphasizing my name. “I haven’t had a chance to show her.”
“Come! Let me show you!” Seline said, jumping up and grabbing my hand. I pulled my hand back. Saline frowned.
“Amber, don’t be upset,” she pouted. I frowned again and looked pointedly at Matthew. He shrugged and then nodded, saying that I should follow Seline. She was heading towards the stairs.
Reluctantly, I followed her upstairs and down the hallway towards the nursery Matthew and I had set up for them. We had spent so much time picking out furniture, bedding, toys, mobiles, a rocking chair, and a footrest. The room had been painted in calming colours and truly was an oasis.
I hoped Seline had gotten something I could easily dispose of, and no one would notice.
“I was so excited I almost gave away the surprise before you had the babies,” she gushed.
3/5
Book 1 Chapter 5
Seline turned and opened the door to the nursery. My heart dropped. I could not believe what I was seeing. I was livid.
She had changed the nursery. Matthew and I had spent days and months planning together, decorating together, and agreeing on everything together, only for Seline to come in and ruin the whole room.
The muted tan and taupe was now a garish sunshine yellow. The indigo drapes were replaced with multicoloured drapes that let all the sunshine into the room. The furniture had been changed from the pine cribs I had found from a local furniture maker to standard white cribs with horribly ugly inlays and characters painted on them.
“She’s speechless!” Seline said to Matthew as he came into the room with the babies in their carriers.
“Amelia?” Matthew said, coming up beside me. “Do you have anything to say?”
I looked at him and then at Seline. I looked back at Matthew. He was smiling encouragingly, waiting for me to say something.
“Excuse me,” I said, turned around, and walked out of the room, then into Matthew’s and mine, where I locked myself in the bathroom.
I slid down to the floor, my back against the door and sobbed. All the work and the time spent together make the babies‘ room perfect and a calm space. Ruined. Completely and totally ruined. And he’d let it happen.
“Amelia?” I heard Matthew knock on the door. I didn’t respond. “Amelia, honey? Seline wanted to do something special for you and the babies. She worked really hard on that.”
“What about the time we put into that room? What about what we decided together for our children, Matthew?”
“Seline wanted to do…”
“Seline, Seline, Seline,” I cried. “Whatever she wants she gets, is that it, Matthew? Who cares what Amelia wants. Who cares that Amelia spent hundreds of hours looking at furniture and colour swatches and planning a perfect room for our children. As long as Seline is happy, why should I
complain?”
“Amelia…” Matthew started. I heard him try the door handle. “Amelia, unlock the door and let me in. We can talk about this.”
I made no move to open the door.
“Adelaide?” Seline’s false sweet voice came through the door. “Did I do something wrong? Do you not like the room? I’m sorry if you don’t like it. I thought a nice, bright room for two amazing babies would be nice. I’m sorry. I just wanted to do something. Ice for you.”
I didn’t respond. I couldn’t. The words that were at the tip of my tongue would do nothing to improve the situation. So I stayed silent, tears streaming down my face. How would I go into that room every day and not feel what I was feeling right now?
I was angry, yes. But I also felt hurt and betrayed. How could Matthew have let Seline do that to the twins‘ room? After the hours, days, and time spent making that room up together for our children, how could he let anyone else just come and change it without a second thought?
Eventually, I heard footsteps leaving our bedroom and the silence that followed. I stayed in the bathroom for a bit longer, hoping Seline wasn’t in the house anymore when I got up and opened the door.
I obviously couldn’t leave the babies, so I went to the nursery to see if Matthew had at least put them in those cribs. I shuddered at the thought of walking into that room that was so different from what I had envisioned, planned and had set up, only for Matthew’s precious Seline to undo everything.
But when I went in to check, the babies weren’t in their room. I listened carefully but didn’t hear anything.
I raced downstairs, hoping maybe Mrs. Watkins, whom I hadn’t even had a chance to say hello to yet, might have the kids with her.
I practically skidded to a halt when I passed the den.
Matthew was sitting on the sofa, holding one of the babies, while Seline sat, nice and cozy, beside him, holding the other. They were smiling and whispering as they looked at my children. The last person I wanted to touch my children was Seline.
I cleared my throat. They both looked up. A look of guilt crossed Matthew’s face for a fleeting second.
Matthew put the baby down in the car seat and approached me. He put his hands gently on my shoulders.
“Are you feeling better now?” he asked, sounding concerned, but not quite looking it.
“No,” I said, frowning at him. “No. I do not feel better. I won’t feel better until that room goes back to the way we decorated it, Matthew.”
*Seline worked really hard on that, Matthew said. “You should apologize to her. You made her feel awful.”
I gaped at Matthew. I… I should apologize to her?
“1–I’m sorry?” I asked in a low voice. “I should apologize to her?”
I was incredulous.
“You made her feel terrible. She wanted to do something nice for you and the babies and she thought you’d prefer a bright and sunny room for them,”
4/5
Book 1: Chapter 5
Matthew said.
I stared at him.
“Have you had an accident? Did you hit your head or something?” I growled at him.
“What?” he frowned at me.
“Do you have amnesia?” I seethed.
“No. What are you talking about?” he frowned deeper.
“Do you not remember the hours and days we – you and I – spent decorating this room? The colour swatches? The paint swatches? The hours in the furniture store picking the beautiful oak cribs we spent a small fortune on?”
He opened his mouth to speak, and then closed it. He did that another couple of times.
“It’s just a room, Amelia,” he said. “Don’t worry. Maybe we can compromise. Put the oak cribs in there. I have to admit, those white cribs, they’re kinda
ugly.”
He smiled at me and touched his forehead to mine.
I didn’t want to acquiesce, but I just wanted to rest, relax, and bond with my babies and husband. Besides, pregnancy hormones and post–pregnancy hormones, am I right?
515
